420 ftw
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
She just threw the soap bottle at me from the ladie's room and keeps asking me when we left the bar and got on the boat.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
The crooked penis I maybe could have looked past...but no foreplay? Deal breaker.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
I'm twenty nine years old, now is not the time to start trying new drugs. I need a hedge fund...not another drug-induced hangover.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
The first thing I did when I got to the apartment was masturbate on the couch
What the hell do you do when your fuck buddy leaves to go for a piss naked and 20 minutes later hasn't come back and can't be found anywhere in the house or outside but has left his phone, tee shirt and shoes in your bedroom.
I don't think there is a pre defined social etiquette for a lost naked fuck buddy now roaming the streets.
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
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