i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
So im walking through ohare and this guy walks by with a cart full of big bottles of liquor. I want to know what flight hes on.
life is no where near the amusement park it was when I was on Vicodin.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
Yessssssssss. I got taped to a couch last night apparently. I also thought i was close to scoring after talking to some chick about hard boiled eggs
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
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