I didn't shave. On purpose
My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
i only understood the part that said mucho orgasmos
i was trying to find the best way to say come over and have sex, without saying it.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
You wanted to go find him and we told you to sit down cause you kept stumbling. You yelled " I CAN STAND!! It's the walking part I can't figure out!"
I was walking out the front door and heard his roomate say "It looks like you need a chiropractor." I think my work here is done.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize