All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
I can't believe he let me cut his hair as stoned as I was.. I think I even cut my own hair too
how are you shocked you fucked her? sure shes hot, but she also washed your beerpong balls in her mouth..... you should probably get tested.
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
you guys just sat there and simultaneously smoked bowls staring at each other... it was like a bowl off or something.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos?
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
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