My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
it wasn't lemon gatorade
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
They wouldn't serve more then two Shots per person, so you grabbed a group of strangers and said u werre buying them all shots, then proceeded to drink all of them.
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
My dad used the quotation mark gesture with his hands when he asked how my "roommate" was doing.
That may be because I drunkenly sent him a pick of you two curled up together like kittens. Two very buff kittens.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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