turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
yeah. pants. i need to put pants on. i didn't do that last night. big mistake
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
I found a half composed text to you this morning and all it said was HELP M. Is that how I ended up at the bottom of the stairwell in only a tee-shirt and one heel?
considering I never received the text I would go with 'yes'.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
Remember that whole "don't let me drink" thing? We should really start sticking to that.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Literally had sex in his grow room under a plant.. ganja queen .
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
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