It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
My hand turned me down
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
he told her to call him "Frog Legs" and she still fucked him and not you.
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
The hot streak continues..if life was NBA jams i would be "on fire" right now
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
Randomize
