I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
if your dad confronts the dude you fucked about the background check he did on him, NOT GONNA GET A CALL BACK
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
WTF? Why is there a pic of my tits in ur dad's office?
You're right, I'd say my real all time low was when I let that fifteen-year-old feel my boob.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
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