I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
it's all just a bunch of faces and i remember what the floor looked like.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
Randomize