Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
I'd like to say he was whispering sweet nothings into my ear all night but really he was just whispering "pussyyy"
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
The amount of my urine my roommate has consumed after I found out he's been eating my food almost offsets how angry I am
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
I'm so festive that I used my jack o lantern bucket as a just in case barf bin
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
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