that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
Well the term Party is used loosely in this situation. Since it will just be mom wine drunk and us eating chips with multiple dips.
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Randomize
