I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Randomize
