I'm smoking weed out of a trumpet
I just did a slip and slide down the hall way of my apartment building
Tie
i just found five singles in my underwear?! im suspicious but delighted none the less
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
vagina is talking i cant
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
I keep reminding myself that my vagina isn't a homeless shelter.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
Randomize