Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
you asked the guy at 7-11 if he remembered when you came in and threw news paper every where... then you did it again
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
Then she yelled something like "YOU HAVE SO MANY FORKS!" before collapsing on the floor
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
