At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
Yes. Ice cream tacos are an important aspect in the bridge of friendship
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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