How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I gave him blue balls & ate the last slice of pie so the chances of a second date are slim...
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
That butt dial turned into a booty call.
Oh? And how would you explain this to your kids?
"Well pumpkin, when mommies and daddies have loved each other so much for a really long time, sometimes they trade off with other mommies and daddies"
I made the antidote to the nasty cognac. I AM THE GOD OF MIXED DRINKS.
Randomize
