just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
I had a party to get rid of booze. Woke up with even more. Will do this till I can open a liquor store
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
My goal tonight is to be arrested by the Police Women of Cincinnati.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
Randomize
