Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Guy Accidentally Starts A Group Chat With All The Girls He’s Talking To And Gets Absolutely Roasted
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
I wonder how he feels knowing that he's the one who turned me gay
The Internet Is Obsessed With This Stripper Who Dropped It Low Just To Eat A Slice Of Pizza
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
I'm either a high functioning alcoholic or I'm making the most of the fact that this is the last year that its socially acceptable to be black-out drunk five days a week.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?