dude i'm inner monologue high
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
I puked off the balcony.
Into the hottub. There were six people in it. I had eaten all their pizza.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
surgery went fine. i cant breath out of my right nostril though. lets not eat peas anymore when we are drunk.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
there's a guy looking for his pants in my room, is he yours?
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
...and as she's going down on me I look at the speedo and I'm doing 15 under, with 6 cars tailgating me, and I know her parents saw her head pop up because they were the car right behind us.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.