I hope the kids appreciate the fact that I jizzed on her instead of on their slide.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She wanted to to do it on top of a horse, I can't compete with that
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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