you kept yelling something about watching the muppets chirstmas carol and trying to turn the t.v. on with your car keys
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I die, sorry about rent.
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Wearing panties to a party gives you a whole new perspective on life.
Pooping to opera.
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