Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
If my eyeballs could make a sound to describe how they feel they would just say uhhhhhhhhggggggghhhhhh.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
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