She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
She just kept saying "bless your heart" to him while he cried because he came so fast. I think a Texas woman was just what he needed
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
He carried you out but the best part is you kept saying "can't I keep dancing" as you were gushing blood
You kept asking us from the backseat if you were driving ok and then you kept talking to your hiccups and yelling at them to "stop it already!"
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Randomize
