i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
i did the 'picked up item' thing from zelda when i jizzed on her face
so you're single again?
yea but it was worth it
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
dude my 8 year old cousin is allowed to drink wine coolers. as long as its infront of my aunt. wtf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
there is literally a full grown man stuck between the radiator and her bed. i thought i kicked him out 20 minutes ago but nope we found him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
I can't turn off my feet"
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
did i just pee glitter
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