does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
filled out health questionnaire for lower premiums a little bit too honestly. Literally got assigned a life coach.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
I refuse to answer that question on the grounds that it may incriminate me
Status: mom bitching about grandma not shutting the fuck up, while not shutting the fuck up. Dear Jesus give me strength or more bourbon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
Randomize