I had a dream that chipotle was out of burritos... Was more like a nightmare.. Gotta go make sure it wasn't real now
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
Omg considering I am covered in cake and probably cocaine that is the greatest news I have ever heard
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
just remembered spooning on the cardboard and confessing to each other we had the spins.
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
What, wait. You are not supposed to drink wine out of the bottle?
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Randomize
