i want to be waterboarded, just to see what all the fuss is about
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
You could become Eskimo brothers with my dad. How can you pass that up? You pussy.
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
Flatmate got laid for the first time in 3 years. I'm baking a cake.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
He kept telling me that he didn't serve two tours in Iraq for my bitch ass to drink banana rum.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
Randomize
