question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Most the numbers in my phone are mistakes. It's a virtual graveyard of people I should never pick up for.
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
Just the amount of girls he locked himself in my room woth says your gonna have to take a cab bro. I don't think he's going anywhere
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
You were chugging tap water out of a running blender screaming "bubbles is Perrier mother fucker"
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
I threw up a lot of peanut butter last night.
You know if we weren't hooking up I think we'd actually be friends
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
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