Me. At least after what I've been through.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
I cannot believe how calm you were last night about telling Katie she was on fire.
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
I was too sleepy and drunk to verbally annihilate anyone and ruin their reason for being. So i just opted to sleep with the fitted sheet on the floor
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
The problem with having sex on the couch is that your blanket ends up in the laundry and you're left cold on the couch the next day.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
Randomize
