They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
I have no recollection of sleep choking you
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am so juiced up on period drugs and coffee I feel like my skin is going to fall off.
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
Being responsible doesn't make memories.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
Do you think it's illegal to drive without your pants on?
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
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