Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
All he did was lie there and used his hands to keep pace. He was like the metronome of sex.
There is a mosh pit in our kitchen. You better hurry.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
We're doing kegstands for my 80th Bday, so don't lose that muscle tone.
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
I puked so hard this morning that I peed my pants. I'm a gem.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
I just want to have sex and eat dumplings. Is that so much to ask?
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
