i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
you're acting like its my fault you're allergic to sperm or something.
i told you we never speak of that again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
there is a video of me from last night trying to light my breath on fire. that drunk.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
Just try not to have a boner when you're giving your best man speech, it will really kill the vibe
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize