Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
Someone just pulled taco bell tacos out of their purse in class....2 problems with here. 1) this class is nutrition 2) taco bell is not open this early.
Clearly I made an impression.
Or at least your vagina did.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
I want to meet new people and vomit on their things instead\n
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
I made out with a guy so that I could get ahead in the bathroom line, totally acceptable
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize
