Today's life lesson: fat girls should not wear tight miniskirts and vinyl leggings. This Forever 21 salesgirl is a hot mess.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I kinda took a step back after our "surprise bottles night"
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
Randomize
