He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
No one appreciates an amoeba in a balloon hat.
I want to have your abortion
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
We've been broken up for 7 months. His mom sent me a card with a brochure inside titled "How at Risk for STD's are you?"
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
No, she isn't nearly as crazy as the girl who wanted to wear a vial of my semen as a necklace.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
You should hear the lecture my mom just gave me about cooking pizzas when im drunk because "I could have died".
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Seriously, this apartment is covered in body glitter. This chick musta been a huuuuuge slut. How do you get it across every surface?
Do you have any forwarding contact info?
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
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