so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
He said I was like bonnie and clyde all rolled into one but twice as trashy and 75% less clothes...
He obviously understands you completely.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
Doug the spinning teacher gave me chlyamdia
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