Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
we traced the origins of this shit fest of a relationship back to a single instance of road head. then we did a reinacment
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
It's entirely possible that I'm fucking yet another gay guy
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
before i went to bed i wrote myself a note that says 'i feel all swirly'
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