do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
Hillary is trying to make pickle pops with vodka and sell them to kids at the ball park.
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It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
Good thing I took the morning after pill cuz I pretty much had packaged seamen in me like I was a squirrel saving it for later or something
I'm going to do lines of vitamin c I cannot be sick for halloween
The creepiest man is serenading me at the bar right now. I had about a quarter of a drink left and the bartender just walked over and filled it with vodka and walked away laughing.
I literally just biked home like I was on the last leg about to win the tour du France. Fuck diarrhea
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Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
I tried to have sex on someone's sisters horse last night
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
Probably some sort of karmic revenge for me looking at titties somewhere along the way
and for that you shall suffer
God: I won't strike you down, but I shall introduce your child to Doja Cat during a quarantine
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
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