am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
her cat was choking so she kept trying to stick her finger in her cat's mouth while saying "it's okay kitty, just do what mommy does"
i want to get drunk and sing the national anthem on your roof again please.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
he couldn't get a boner so he asked me to sing you shook me all night long to his penis. I think it was weirder that it actually worked
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
I woke up on the couch screaming in pain. I don't know how ended up there or why my foot was double the size. all I know is I'm now in a cast and never drinking tequila again. worst hangover ever.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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