If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
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