I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
You can buy vodka at target here.. Maybe Missouri isn't so bad after all
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Jen gave my number to some guy she met in NY. He sent me a picture of his weiner. He had nice shoes. I replied with a pic of bacon.
When in doubt always reply with bacon.
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
Randomize
