We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
At a pool hall. Dudes walkin around with fuzzy handcuffs cuffed to his belt. The douche bag level grows higher still
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
I told her shower beers are even better when you have someone in there with you and she said she's been looking for a new drinking buddy. It's a goooooo
I'm still getting random messages from guys about my Halloween outfit. Electrical tape is coming back next year
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
It's gonna be like a sexual version of A Christmas Carol in my house in a few days.
This fucking storm better not ruin my sex plans this weekend
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Randomize
