That level of neurosis does not find love outside of Grey's Anatomy.
i forgot i changed ur name in my phone to "the situation" so when u texted me i got really excited for a hot second
i thought we decided on me being "the altercation" instead
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
How unacceptable would it be to bar hop with a funnel in the square? It's Halloweekend and I plan on going hard. I can claim it goes w/ my costume. But I don't think the MIMITW uses funnels.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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