Charged a drink to your name last night. Thanks for the whiskey
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
Also I smoked away my sore throat last night. It's a 420 miracle.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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