White coat. Heels.
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
The engagement ring savings account is now the strippers and gin savings account. What are you doing tonight?
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Do they still have sex clubs in San Francisco? Because that'd be an interesting way to spend Easter.
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
I just got a snapchat of a flaccid penis with the caption "happy belated valentine's day." What did I do to deserve this
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
Randomize
