i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Sad news: I might have to institute a "once-per-day" policy on getting trashed downtown. Sorry, reputation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
It's all fun and games until some random starts jerking it on the deck.
Also 70% sure I have a splinter on my eyelid from last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The length of my leg hair is a constant reminder of how long it's been since I even thought I had a chance of getting laid.
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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