Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
Shaving your vagina at 8 months pregnant is not an easy chore.
Counseling BFF to break up with her BF. We will get that 3-way
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
Public service announcement: if you would like to continue receiving blow jobs, a 25% increase in fuck-giving will be expected immediately, and you're expected to give an actual flying fuck at least once a week. Brought to you by the ad council.
I puked in a solo cup and then offered it to him. So yeah, it was a rough night.
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Randomize