friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
Randomize
