So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
he has 3 profile pictures up and all of them are him riding jet skis
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
Some dudes just stopped and stared at me peeing in the street for like 5mins, and I yelled HEY. HEY. WANT ME TO SHIT IN YOUR MOUTH? I'LL SHIT ON YOUR CHEST FOR FIVE DOLLARS, PAPI
this is why i love drunk you