I look like Roseanne just got in a bar fight with Rosie O'Donnell.
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
He hit on a bridal shower w/ his hand on my tit the entire time. Gave his number to the mom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
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