My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
she showed up with nothing but olive garden breadsticks in her purse.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
I'm not really sure what went on in my mouth last night but right now it tastes like what I can only imagine is a mixture of astroglide and peanut butter. You hungry?
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
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