Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
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waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
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Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
he went down on me to a drake song and now i think i need a penicillin shot
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
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